Letters from the Editors

The Trash Blog was conceived on Christmas Day 2009. A longtime brainchild of Jones Hewitt combined with the previously failed blogging attempts of Herman Carson, The Trash Blog represented, symbolized everything they were. The first post, the mission statement read as follows: The sole purpose of this leisure blog is simply to make money. Our deep distaste of trash as a source of entertainment is an afterthought. Jones and Herman wanted to get money, get paid by demeaning and condescending others, everything they aspired to be.

Fast forward to February 22, 2010. After a week of break due to being shit for screwed, Jones and Herman returned to The Trash Blog only to see that its Google AdSense was disabled a week earlier. They fired off a quick appeal to Google just to see it be denied hours later.

Fast forward to now...

What the fuck? What the fuck? Fuck you. Son of a motherfucking cunt bitch. You bitch ass motherfuckers got your panties in a bunch after that little bitchfest on Valentine's Day. So hurt like a bitch that you threw together a mini revolt to click on ads a million motherfucking times to fuck us over. Fuck you. Oh play innocent, like you don't know what the fuck's going on. We'll tell you what the fuck's going on. Up yours you faggot-fucking shit-packing motherfucking dipshit. Suck yourself you fucking piece of worthless, throw away, useless, waste of space, waste of air, waste of a human being, waste of life, waste of resources, waste of our time fatherfucking trash. We know what you did you queer-fucking asshole-wrecking no good piece of shit. You clicked on our ads a fucking million fucking times to get all up in Google's ass to fucking ban us. You hurt us, not on the inside you fag, but our wallets, our motherfucking bottom line. Our fucking money, our fucking mission statement. You tree trunk piece of ass, preejaculating piece of dickshit. Fuck everything about you. Jones was this fucking close to donating $20 to Haiti. Twice what most people are giving. $20 more than what you didn't give you sacks of shits. How does that make you feel to deny Haitians life? That's fucking messed up. You should be ashamed of yourself. So shamed that you should fucking kill yourself. Jump in front of a train. Get your fucking body sawed in mutilated unclean halves. We want to see your fucking intestines burst out. We want to see a fucking white blanket over your dead ass, a fucking body bag. Eat dick and die. No one is going to give a shit. Even your cock's not going to give a shit. The world could use less humans to fuck up the earth. You dying will save like a million fucking trees, reform the fucking ozone layer, and there will be one less fucking car on the road. Thank fucking you. We want you to read this whole entire fucking letter. Don't stop here you fucking half-assed little fucker. We're not done with your punk gay ass.

What is the definition of trash? Trash is a very popular insult in Asian culture, and we feel we need to spread the hate. Trash means that no one cares about you. You're a sad, worthless, invaluable, junk, throw away, stepped upon, push over, no good, expired, abandoned, good for nothing, inferior, insignificant, meaningless, mediocre, miserable, negligible, nothing, pointless, trivial, unessential, unimportant, waste of everything in fucking existence, shit, fucker, ass, bitch, asshole, bastard, cunt, faggot, fag, homo, queer, gay, dumbfuck, stupidfuck, shitfuck, assfuck, bitchfuck, bitch ass, gay ass, homo ass, queer ass, faggot ass, fuck ass, shit ass, hook ass, cocksucking, dicksuck, penis-pleasing, gay queer homo faggot fag motherfucker all in one.

Youse trash.

Written by Herman Carson. Approved by Jones Hewitt.