Stragglers

It seemed like a normal shit. You know...it came out right away with little or no effort. I felt relaxed. Breathing was normal. No perspiration because I didn't have to use any of my techniques. The room temperature was cool enough not to give me mushy shit. 2 textbook medium deuces dropped. I rolled down 3 squares of toilet paper expecting a clean shit. I'm down from 5. I like to brag about that...saving trees and shit. Anyway I did one wipe. I tossed it into the trash can and noticed something odd. What the fuck? I saw 2 round specks of shit on the tissue. I grab another 3. That's painful. I wipe again. What the fuck again? Clean as a pampered baby's asshole. Where's the shit smears? Didn't I just wipe shit from my uncleaned asshole? It was a ghost shit, but at the same time it's wasn't. I'm calling this "stragglers". Fuck me up the asshole.